|Poor boy is sick -- again.|
For a couple of weeks everyone was talking (appropriately) about their goals, hopes, and plans for 2013. Every year since we've been married we have happened to make our New Years Resolutions on the drive home from Utah. This is also when we review the previous year's goals to see how we did. I was expecting to be disappointed this time but we actually did pretty well. 2013's list has been filled with things that are most definitely on loads of lists -- things that would make us (kids included) healthier, happier, smarter, more financially secure, etc.
2012 was good, but not my favorite. Not at all. It started out awesome and then got frumpy and lame in a variety of ways. Of course there were wonderful things that happened, my life is chock full of obvious blessings, and I don't mean to sound ungrateful. But, there were things like the emotionally taxing Presidential election and its devastating and frustrating outcome. I've slowly been immersed into Mother-of-a-Strong-Willed-Toddler Land and trying to find my footing there (but that's another blog post). There are people I love who were raked through the coals in 2012, and some whose trials, I've accepted, probably won't go away any time soon because either that is their choice or that is their lot. Once again, I have to recognize my lack of control on what seems like about a bazillion things in life. Some good and comforting lessons have come from all of this, but again, that's another blog post for another day. And, as fantastic as it is to get another baby into our family, pregnancy has made all the lows lower. I wish I were one of those women who loves pregnancy -- I do! Now that it's been my 2nd time around, it's official: it's hard for me. It's worth it for sure, I mean, the pot of gold at the end of the rainbow is second to none, but it's a doozy to get there. Did I emphasize getting there takes basically a year? Once I said that to Jeff and he said, "It's 9 months." HA! That's what guys think! But that brings me to my hopes for 2013:
- I know that roller coaster does not necessarily come to a whip-lashed stop the moment they wipe off the baby and put him on my chest, but I'm really putting it into my head that I must/want to rally for this post-partum fest and not miss out on the joys of newborn land because I'm really (really?) tired and my body is doling out a few other inconveniences. I'm trying to keep my expectations low but at the same time remind myself I'm a big girl and really, I still can choose to let hard things roll off my back.
- Going along with this...I want to be patient with Jude as we all adjust. He's my baby. I just have this feeling that unless I am extremely vigilant about this, all the patience he deserves could fly out the window in a jiff.
- I want to continue organizing and stream-lining the house. I also may have a rip-snorting plan for revamping the bathrooms that would be cheap and awesome.
- Duh, I want to lose all the baby weight within 24 hours (like TAMN, may she R.I.P.), but a few months would also have me jumping for joy and make all the restraint I've exercised during pregnancy worth it. If I'm still buxom and flabby at Baby 2's bday, count on me becoming as big as a house during Pregnancy #3!
- I want to be a better Daughter of Zion (do I hear a song coming on?). In the last few months especially, I've had so many experiences and watched heaps of things happen around me that've make me more proud and grateful than ever before to be a member of the LDS church. Faith has always come easily to me, but I want to up the spiritual ante for obvious reasons. Who regrets doing that? Besides the fact that it's a responsibility of mine, the benefits are sort of innumerable.
Long blog post cut short, I'm taking matters into my own hands, and want 2013 to be one for the books, even if nothing dazzling happens beyond feeling like a more effective mom, a better wife, living in a more methodized house, who has a better relationship with God.