Mother

Somehow, I kept forgetting that I got myself a Mother's Day this year. Jeff reminded me over and over with many acts of spoiling and love. Jude was a doll at church and after I fed him in the Mother's Lounge during Sacrament Meeting, he slept through Sunday School and Relief Society. Cha-Ching!

Then, on this day that celebrates those who expend blood, sweat, and tears for their small ones, I got to take part in some of the sweat and tears with NAP TRAINING, PART II. At 6 weeks I was thrilled to borrow this book from my friend Katie that told me not to sleep train colicky babies. DONE. Now that his colic seems to be pretty much gone, I know I've got to get to work. Lucky duck me, Jude sleeps through the night, maybe waking once every other night (which is fine with me since I'd grown to love our groggy midnight snacks together). However, daytime is a completely different story. He won't nap unless I'm holding him, and even when he's riding the REM cycle, when I put him down in his crib, he'll wake up 5 to 10 minutes later. What a snuggle junkie. And I, the weakling, can't stand to hear him cry, and I oblige him with a nap in my arms 4 or 5 times a day.

What does this mean for me?

The couch. Frustration. Maybe this seems trivial to some, and believe me, I am over the moon that I have a sweet, smiley, healthy baby that has brought so many unparalleled wonderfuls into our home, but this is a horrible MO born of his colic. The reason it's still going on is because I know that while colic broke my heart, getting him to be able to nap like a normal baby would also be heartbreaking. But, I have been a bump on a log the last 3 months, unable to do a thing but hold him. At some point, normal life must resume.

We started yesterday afternoon and he screamed and screamed. My mother and mother-in-law have given me buckets of encouragement and reminded me that it will be harder on me than him. Jeff went in to comfort him after a while and ran his finger from his brow to the tip of his nose (his favorite) until he started to drift off. It was a start. I went in to check on him later and he was still calming himself down. So sad.

So today we continue on. I know it's not like he's addicted to heroine or has decided that Reba McIntyre is his life hero, but even the promise of someday soon being able to do something crazy like refinish the dressers that have been sitting in our garage for 7 months does not make this easy on my Merzy Mom heart.

IN BRIGHTER MOTHER'S DAY NEWS:

Jeff and I are blessed with Mary Poppins Mothers who know everything, can do anything, and that includes always saying the right thing at the right time, and knowing how to spin sunshine on gloomy situations and magnify the cheerful days. Jude hit the jackpot with 2 grandmothers and a great-grandmother of love and vigor and vim.

I'm grateful for them, and I'm grateful to be a a mother to the the Jude of the world. This new phase of life has made me even more grateful for my Jeff, who makes everything, and I do mean everything, better.