Just a shower

This morning I sent the following text message to Jeff:

"Remind me to rant tonight about how we need a new showering routine for me."

It was followed by several fire breathing emoticons.

Unless I leap out of bed at 6:00 in the morning when Jude wakes up and comes to snuggle, and before Grahamykins is awake, it rarely ends up happening until after everyone's eaten brek, and Jeff is out the door on his way to his office.  Jude would probably be content to stay downstairs and watch tv while I cleansed, but I don't trust a) him alone with Graham, because he tends to lay down quite an axe for minor infractions like toy stealing, and b) Graham likes to climb onto the couch and lean over the arm to try to play with the back yard light switch, which resulted in a goose egg a few weeks ago. 


So they all have to come upstairs with me.  I shut the bedroom door, shut the closet door, shut the door to the toilet room so G won't try to splash (which he adores for some reason -- Jude never did so this is new to me), and I have child locks on the cabinets with cleaning supplies.  I set up Jude with the iPad and Graham with some toys.


This is what happened this morning while I took a 5 minute shower (and essentially what happens every single time they come with me):


I hop in the shower.
I can hear Graham yelling for joy and banging on the sliding closet doors (which he has knocked off its rollers plenty of times).
Jude yells, "No yelling, Graham!!!"  (eye roll)
Graham comes into the bathroom, turns on the bath water.
Jude follows 30 seconds behind, starts to squish a squealing Graham away from the faucet because he knows I don't want to waste water.  I say, "It's ok, Jude, I'd rather have the water on than you hurting him!"
After a few more nudges, Jude stops squishing (I get the sneaking suspicion it has nothing to do with my scolding, he is just bored of it and knows he'll have ample opportunities later for additional squishing/body slamming). 
I realize I left my face wash at the sink and dart out of the shower to grab it.  Water is spilt on the floor.
Graham starts wiping the water all around.
Jude pretends he's a dog and starts crawl-hopping all around, growl/biting at and chasing G who thinks it's a lovely game.
As they travel back toward the bedroom they come across a snag in the carpet and start to pull on it.
"STOP!!!!"  They only stop when they hear me turn the water off.
As soon as I step out of the shower they think it's about time I pick them up, so before I can even reach for my moisturizer I have 4 little hands tugging on my towel, my tangled hair is dripping all over them and the floor, I'm freezing, AND I keep thinking, "JUDE IS TOO OLD TO BE IN HERE!!!"  HMPHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!

As I go to pick out clothes they continue to find ways to destroy our room.  The internet wiring in the closet looks fun.  My tub of maternity clothes has a broken lid that is fun to open.  They found a cufflink on the floor.  Oh -- look at that!  The sock drawer!!

And all the while I'm fuming and thinking, "I'M JUST TRYING TO LIVE MY LIFE!"

Now I have to go rant to Jeff about this.

The END

Mother's Day 2014

High 5 for Mother's Day!  I've felt pretty worn out for the last couple of weeks, so today felt awesome. 


I slept in (as much as one can when you have church that begins at 9am), came downstairs to a place setting of vanilla pudding in a tea cup, a frosty can of Diet Coke next to a goblet with ice, a card that Jude colored for me, and a half pound of bridge mix next to that.  Charming!


It's either hilarious or terrible that in this phase of raising young children, on Mother's Day all I want is to be excused from doing a lot of my mothering duties.  I'm sure in another season of life I will not feel this way, but this year, I absolutely was stoked to wave goodbye to my 3 boys while they wheeled off to the park, I loved not doing the dishes after dinner, and all the motherly accolades that they threw at us at church were music to mine ears.


I'm lucky to have the people in my life that made this day special and relaxing for me, and I'm lucky to have mothers in my life that inspire me and make me want to be a better mother. Cheers!

Graham is ONE!

How amazingly cruel it is that we can't rewind.  Our Grahammy's first year has gone by in the blink of an eye.  Each day I knew that I was in the middle of something singularly wonderful with this cherub on my hip.

Obviously, being the first child has its bonuses and drawbacks.  Jude got me (us) all to himself for 2 years.  But, I was a novice, and that dragged a lot of minuses with it.  Graham had to share me from the minute I got home from the hospital, but I knew what I was doing (mostly).  I also didn't really care much about what developmental milestones were on the horizon, I was able to appreciate each minute just for what it was and where he was in his babyness.  I had made it through 2 years of parenting Jude, I knew I could make it through with Graham, so I was ready to relish.

On top of this, Graham is, in my humble opinion, just perfect.  And he makes us all happier and better.  There is no grump he could not charm out of a funk; he is the ultimate elixir of joy.  These last several weeks I can see some of the pre-toddler angst as he wants to keep up with Jude but lacks some of the mobility, but it is his inclination to enjoy life.  I wonder daily how I got so lucky to be mother to these two boys, and I'm trying really hard not to screw them up.

The LDS church promises joy in this life and in the life to come if we are faithful.  I've tried to always live in a way that would make Heavenly Father happy.  With my husband and our children, I feel God has given me this joy beyond measure, despite my many, many flaws and the mistakes I make.  It's like Elder Holland once said, "There is theology in the family."  Now I'm going off on a tangent, but as I look back on this last year with Graham, and the last 3 years with Jude, and last 4 years with Jeff, the love is so sacred, I know in my heart it could not touch this life only.  This is stuff that is absolutely heavenly, and meant to go on forever.

Graham, thanks for being my baby.  We can't do anything but love you!

Today

Kids wake up at 5:45 (we blame setting the clocks back).

Try to get them back to sleep.

Give up.

The boys jump on mom and dad's bed and give a few snuggles (at least the boys are ecstatically joyful in the morning).

Downstairs.

Jeff goes running.

Breakfast.

Lower Graham's crib to the lowest level.

Jeff comes back, gets ready for work.

Graham's got a stinky bum to change.

Jeff goes to work.

I go running with the boys in the BOB.

Graham falls asleep in the stroller, move him to his crib once we're home.

Take a shower while Jude destroys my bedroom (way more fun than the iPad).

Get dressed and put on some mascara.

Read books and build things with Jude and his Duplos.

Jude wants snacks.

Graham wakes up.

Lunch.

Speech therapy.

On the way to speech therapy Jude tells me about fire trucks and counts to ten "one two free nine ten six!"

Jude falls asleep in the car on the way home from Speech (Hallelujah!!!)

Giddily and gingerly remove Jude from his car seat to put him in his bed. 

He wakes up right as I'm closing his curtains.  

I say "goodnight!" and escape.

He does not fall back to sleep as I'd hoped.

I let him cry for a few minutes but I need to go get groceries anyway so I open the door to his room.

He says matter-of-factly, "I'm sad."

Getting out of a nap makes him happy.

We go to 2 grocery stores.

Jude wants to eat and buy everything he sees.

Get all the ingredients for chicken noodle soup for the Woods because they just had Baby Luke.

Get home.

Jude is throwing a tantrum because we did not go to Kids Club at the gym (little does he know I froze my pass).

Realize I forgot the egg for the noodles.

Text neighbor. 

She's got an egg.

I make dinner while the boys play so well together I wish I could sit down with them.

Graham goes down for his afternoon nap despite the fact that Jude bypasses the gate, follows me upstairs and is making explosion noises.

Jude and I play chase and watch a snippet of Cars before it's time to take dinner to the Woods'. 

Wake up Graham, load it all up in the car.

Graham blows out his diaper on the way to the Woods'.

Jude tells me Amber has pretty hair and he loves her.

Get to the Woods'.

Visit with them for a bit.

Go to the pediatrician so Jude can get his flu shot.

Jude doesn't even flinch over the shot.

Go home.

Eat dinner.

Diapers.

Jammies.

Brush teeth.

30 minutes of Cars.

Shut down Jude's attempts at negotiating bedtime.

Put Jude's clean sheets on his bed while the boys try to dissemble the vacuum.

Read bedtime books.

Family prayer minus Jeff who's working late.

Night night songs.

Hugs.

Kisses.

I love yous.

I eat 2 cookies.

I want more cookies.

I polish off the last couple bites of Jude's dinner.

Start working on the stuff I'm doing 3-10 hours a week for my friend's mom's non-profit.

Take a break to go over the day's happenings because I'm wondering why I'm wiped out.

Tadaaaa.

The End.

Mama mia

Having these babies of mine means that I know so well what it's like to have them drift off to sleep in my tired, jiggly arms. I get to be the person to seize the endless opportunities to pump them full of love and self-esteem, and I know their smells and their facial expressions.  I am around when Jude goes from having no interest in crayons and coloring books to choosing to sit at the table and scribble on page after page. Yesterday I saw Graham holding a binky in one hand, and a board book in the other, and then he figured out that if he bonked them together, it made a really cool noise, and then I watched him play his new game for a little while.  Because I have little kids, and am not done having them, I am trying to let it go when a fly comes in the house because Jude doesn't understand yet that you have to shut the door quickly on a hot day.  I have to accept that the house will just be a little messier than I want it to at certain points of the day.  Tonight I held Graham on my lap during dinner, and when I was reaching down to fetch his binky, he pulled my plate of rice and beans onto the floor.  It had been a long day and it's so dumb but I almost cried.  I'm so used to spit up.  Buuuut, if I leave the room for 30 seconds, when I come back in Jude yells, "Mommy herrrrr" and runs and jumps into my arms.  We have a family handshake.  Graham lets me squeeze him as tight as I please, and squish his ample cheeks against mine.  I have had so many times when I'm running errands with them and there's some breed of child-spun disaster, even when I prepare well, and I think to myself, "Can't I just do this ONE THING??????"*.  And then I vow to only ever grocery shop by myself at night forever more (this resolve never lasts).  When I cut my finger wide open the other day, my cute little 2 year old wouldn't stop talking about my owie and has given it about 20 kisses.  Today Jude was talking all about how "Chwist fwends" (Christ's friends) were speaking on tv for General Conference.  They just pull these things on me and it charms me more than anything.

It's so many good things and so many bad things and I love it.  I used to be cooler, but I think hunkering down with my babies makes my life awesome**.

Note: I did not pose these pictures at all.

* Whenever there's a meltdown amidst attempted productivity and I think to myself, "Can't I just do this ONE THING???" I then automatically hear Will Ferrell in my head from that SNL skit, "Can I just finish one damn story??"

** Last week Jude's Speech Therapist asked me after his session, "Who in your family says 'awesome'?  Jude was saying it non-stop today."  I laughed -- "My husband and I both do.  Everything is either awesome or crappy."  We need to start infusing some different adjectives.

While Jude was out with Papa

I got some 1:1 with my cracker.  He is the apple of my eye.

ME

What's been going on with ME lately, I know you are ALL dying to know.

When I wake up in the morning, I think, "Man, I am TIRED."  But then a split second later I'm already wondering, "How can I keep Jude and Graham happiest today?"  The key to Jude's heart is to remain in motion and, even better, do so outdoors.  Usually we are outta the house by 9.  Doing anything.  I'm walking with Graham strapped to me while Jude rides his scooter around the neighborhood, and we stop at a few parks along the way.  We go to Pretend City, or a splash pad, or the beach.  We go to our favorite park a couple miles away and meet friends.  We go to this one so often I've gotten to know a few of the moms that are also regularly there.  This week when there were some older punk kids (probably ages 7 and 6) who were bossing around Jude, scolding him, and otherwise power tripping on him, I felt totally comfortable dishing it back to them because I sort of felt like the park was my turf (and my son is definitely my turf).  Jude, by the way, didn't really seem to notice that they were being rude, but I guess this is protective me.  ("He already has a mom, you don't need to boss him around.  If you don't want to share your toy, you don't have to.  Don't go on and on about it and lecture him."  ETC.  The nanny seemed pretty checked out, too.)

Anyway, I am lucky to have good friends in the area with kids that Jude loves to play with.  I feel like I'm getting a little collection of activities that accommodate all of us.  That is solid gold, and I'm so grateful.

I've also changed my seasons tune.  I have always been a winter girl.  I may be evolving into a year-round girl.  I'll never stop loving the fall and winter holidays and the coziness thereof, but the kid-approved activities that are what summer is ALL ABOUT are just tickling my fancy.  And hey, I'm not pregnant this summer, so I have nothing to complain about with the weather that keeps getting toastier.

Anyway, with all these awesome circumstances, here are things I need to figure out, and/or complaints:

- Complaint #1: My hair has been falling out for almost 2 months now, in true post-partum fashion.  Buckets of stupid hair shedding all over the place.  Please, make it stop!
- Complaint #2: Remember how disciplined I was ALLLLL during Graham's pregnancy?  I worked out 6 days a week, ate reasonably, and gained 30 lbs.  Well guess what: it was lame, because both pregnancies now, I've just lost everything but the last 15-20 lbs pretty much immediately, and as long as I'm nursing those lbs won't budge.  The only incentive to repeating the pregnancy health fest with the next baby is just that it was easier WHILE I was pregnant to live life with 30 extra pounds as opposed to 70.  Hmph.  I am actually very frustrated about this, but I've had a few months accept it and am sucking it up for the sake of not paying for formula, and oh, the additional health benefits of breastfeeding my infant as long as I can :).
- Complaint #3: I AM TIRED.  Lately I feel more tired than I did when Graham was a newborn.  I texted my mom a few weeks ago, "I don't remember feeling this tired with Jude, but could it be because of nursing?  I feel like I've been hit by a Kenworth most of the time."  My mom said, and I could hear her laughing in her text, "Merzy!  It's because you have 2 small children!  You're 'on' ALL the time."
- I-MUST-FIGURE-OUT #1: how my morning routine can include working out, showering, and getting out the door for errands and/or to a play date before 10am.  I have never been able to do all of those things successfully together.  Come on, people, it's been 4.5 months.
- I-MUST-FIGURE-OUT #2: I'm trying to get meals planned for the week so I can grocery shop 1-2 times a week instead of like 4 (which is what happens when I decide what to make for dinner at the beginning of every day).  It's pretty crappy when you have to run to the store at 4:30 to grab something to schlep something together.  It's so much easier to have it all planned in advance, but that means 1-2 LONG grocery store trips, or trips to multiple stores if I want to get the best deals on different items, and some days Jude just BRINGS IT and I have to not pick that battle.

Not withstanding these lame-o things, I am really happy.  I'm trying really hard to just enjoy my days and let the things I can't control roll to the gutter in the bowling alley of life.

Ok based on my last sentence I think it's safe to say bedtime has come.

Mother's Day 2013

Another good one.  It included sleeping in, Jeff made me a fruit plate for breakfast, he and "the kids" gave me a cute skirt, and my parents, Sarah, and Harry came over for dinner.  At church we were given mini Dreyer's ice creams (I chose cookie dough).

This was my 3rd Mother's Day, and each year Jude has done something out of the ordinary to celebrate.  When he was still in his fussy infant phase, he gave me the gift of a Relief Society lesson by snoozing like the dead on my lap.  The next year when he was a tireless 1-year-old, he slept in till 9:30.  And this year, he sat on my lap for 90% of Sacrament Meeting and, in the middle of it, for no apparent reason other than he loves me, he gave me a tight, prolonged hug around my neck and a big kiss on the cheek. He always pulls through on my special day :).

We all know I love being a mom, but lately I've been feeling especially grateful to have my own Mother and Mother-in-Law.

My Mom knows how to crochet, knit, embroider, sew everything from a slip cover to a wedding dress, reupholsters furniture, paints the interior and exterior of her house, can nourish a dying flower back to life, remembers all the poetry from her English Lit classes in college (and thus was able to help me over the phone with mine), cooks healthy, and even somehow makes eating chocolate appear healthy (since she does it a lot and has never gained weight in the 30 years I've been on this beautiful Earth).  She is tactful and gracious, and I've decided she's figured out how to be a "positive realist".  She was a little hard on me in my teen years about things like curfew and boyfriends, but now that I'm a mom, I understand she couldn't NOT worry, and a vigilant parent is better than an AWOL parent.  But most importantly, she's a toasty blanket of love and the sound of encouragement and calm.  Bad day, good day, she always improves a day.  When she can, she takes a half-day off to down to hang out with me and my boys, and those days are so delicious.  We talk, we laugh, we eat a treat, and she'll always claim to have a "little bit of a headache" coming on and therefore needs sips of my Diet Coke.  Lately, Sarah joins us too.  "Mimi" is the Jude whisperer, and he's kind of obsessed with her.  She gave him a toy car, which he calls "my Mimi car!" and must take it with him everywhere.  He panics if I try to put him down for a nap without it.  Anyway, she's a blessing we all appreciate.

My Mother-in-Law gave me a hug the first time I met her when Jeff and I were dating.  She was one of the only people who encouraged me to sleep train Jude, which was a very important thing for me to do (another blog post for another day).  She goes out of her way to help me with the boys, and they love her because she's awesome but also because I know they feel so much love from her.  She also sews, arranges flowers, crochets, and has embroidered blankets for Jude and Graham, and makes Christmas jammies every year.  She's classy, honest, smart, and nurturing.  Charissa has a great sense of humor and whenever we get together we all stay up late laughing and talktalktalking.  I often crave sitting in their family room with some Steven's Hot Chocolate or a Diet Pepsi, watching TV and talking.  One of the biggest reasons why I'll love her forever is without her, and alllllll that she put into raising Jeff, I wouldn't be a wife and mother.   I hope I can also raise Jude and Graham to be clever hunks that will make a girl want to sign up for a lifetime AND eternity together like I do with my Jeff.  I can't wait for my in-laws to quit working already so they can come visit us more.

In short, I hit the jackpot on Moms, and don't think I deserve them.  As it is, however, they're stuck with me.

Happy Mother's Day to all, and to all a goodnight!

Words!

Here are some exciting updates on Jude:

• 3 weeks in speech therapy, and he is finally unleashing his inner parrot.  We are so proud of him!  We go twice a week, 30 minute sessions.  He looooves his speech therapist.  Today I got there early because I needed to nurse Graham in the car before we went in.  The entire time Jude was yelling, "Go go!!!" and pointing at the door handle.  When we were in the lobby waiting, and she (Miss Chris) came out with the kid she works with before, he ran over, held her hand while she gave the report to the parent, and then as she took him back he cheerfully waved to me and said, "Bye!"  I'm glad he has fun in there, and glad it seems to be working.  He adds a bunch of new words pretty much every day, and putting words together for sentences is in sight.  (He will already say "My ______" and "Bye bye ______" or "Hi _____" sometimes, which is awesome.)  This is the answer to our prayers.  It's hard enough being 2 years old without adding communication barriers to the pile!
• He figured out his scooter, and loves to be outside with it or his Spider-Man truck or "Lo-lo" (Back-hoe loader).  Toys get old fast, but something he can ride around on outside will be a favorite for months and months.
• He has outgrown another pair of pants and on average I have to buy him a bigger size shoe every 2 months.
• He is finally at peace (or something like it) with the ear plugs he must wear for water time because of his tubes.  I'd been worried our pool/splash pad time would suffer this summer if he never stopped trying to take them out.
• He's eating a wider variety of victuals, and is not so addicted to milk anymore.  
• He suddenly really wants to be snuggled up in blankets when he's outside of the crib, which is cute (and maybe an act of Graham jealousy).

And, much to the chagrin of some, we buzzed his unruly mop of hair.

We did this because:

• His curls will come back (we buzzed him last July, too).
• There was this spot in the back that didn't really curl -- it looked weird and I kept having to fight the urge to take a hot roller to it.
• When he's throwing a red-faced, flailing-limbed, ear-splitting tantrum, you look at that wild frenzy on top of his head and feel that it just adds to the chaos.  His tidier appearance really does help the vibe of the emotional roller coaster that is a day in the life of a 2-year-old Jude!

He's also, of course, just acting older.  You just have to hang out with him to see it.  It's like Graham is this little toy that smiles and gurgles at us, and Jude is a companion.  Since he's still not exactly conversational it shows up in other ways.  I know that he knows exactly what I'm talking about.  I am starting to see SOME reasoning seeping in (like "You can have your gummy vitamin AFTER you finish your breakfast").  The other day I gave him an "energy bite" to eat (maybe I'll post the recipe if I have the energy that those bites are supposed to pass along), but I told him he had to eat it right away if he was going to be out of his booster with it.  A few minutes went by wherein he held it, and then he put it next to me on the couch.  Exactly what I didn't want to have happen.  But I was nursing and didn't want to get up to put it on the counter.  So I ate it.  About 12 seconds later he came back looking for it, saw it was gone, goes, "Hmmmmm...." and looks behind him and under the couch.  Then he stands up, sees me still chewing and exclaims, "Heeey!" It was cute and funny, and he didn't hold it against me.  He had, after all, been given the terms of the energy bite bequeathal.

I get really frustrated with the blood curdling screaming he does just to get a rise out of me.  His face will be almost stoic, he's not throwing a tantrum, he just opens up his mouth and projects like an classically trained opera singer who switched careers to horror film star.  And if it were just my ears being most offended that would be one thing, but it scares the crap out of Graham and makes him cry.  And the best way to get him to stop while I'm driving or nursing is to ignore it, but then that means we all have to endure 7 or 8 screams before he gives up.  My ears are nigh unto exploding at times.  

He also, when both boys are in the stroller and Jude wants to be free, reaches over to Graham's side and grab at his face.  OOoooooh this is a problem.  He doesn't do it to hurt Graham, he does it because he knows I won't ignore it.  I block it as best I can but Graham's had a couple of scratches, or at the very least been woken up, and I don't know what I should do about this.  I can't let it go on, it has to stop NOW.  I might handcuff him :).  In a month or two when Graham can sit in the stroller without the car seat, Jude won't be able to reach him anymore.  Any idiz?

Anyway, I am trying to approach each day full of positive thinking and energy to teach him, and fill his day with the things he loves most: friends, the outdoors, and me chasing and tickling him.  As much as he can squelch my patience, the older he gets the more ways he learns to show love in return, which means my day is spotted with greater flourishes of heaven.  HEA-VEN.  Tonight he gave me about 13 kisses in rapid-fire succession.  

Which brings me to bedtime.  Last night he gave me a long kiss on one cheek, then took his little hand, said, "That," and turned my cheek so he could give me a kiss on my other cheek.  I swear, night time rituals are magical.  All the day's mischief and acts of defiance are forgiven as I read my sweet jammies boy his Night Night books, some scriptures, we pray (he now says "Amen!"), and I sing to him while he snuggles up on my shoulder.  Then I put him, his sippy, the toy cars he has chosen to sleep with, and a couple blankets in his crib, have Lovey Monkey give him a kiss on the cheek too, we say "Night night" to each other, I run my finger from his forehead to the tip of his nose as I have since he was a newborn, turn on the noise maker, and that is the end of another day with my Jude.

Love it.

Graham: 12 Weeks

Onward!

I love 12 weeks.  Last night Graham just hauled off and slept through the night.  Whaaaat?  And when Jude hit 12 weeks, he mysteriously wanted to start napping in his crib instead of only (and I do mean only) in my arms.  It's like they hit this particular day of life and a little button is pushed inside their squishy bodies and they are ready for a new phase.

Anyway, I am currently in baby heaven.  Graham -- I am obsessed with him.  He is at that age of solid gold where he just smiles, laughs, coos and gurgles at me.  His eyes actually twinkle, and they are bordered by these insane lashes that get caught in his eyebrows.  Swatting and attempting the grasps are the chores that keep him occupied while I'm chasing Jude, and when he needs a break he will usually just chill for a little bit until he gets bored or lonely.  I feel guilty that Jude still dominates every day, but I know that as Graham grows he will demand more attention and we will all figure out how to adjust.  The funny thing is, Jude is also in love with G, and spends a lot of time cooing at him and trying to give him too-tight hugs or pick him up, but when he is in Graham's line of vision he never holds still long enough so they Graham can respond.  Graham was smiling at Jude for the first time a couple of days ago as Jude inspected a train.  I said, "Jude, look!  Baby Graham's smiling at you!"  And Jude caught a sliver of that brotherly love before Graham was onto something else to stare at.  

I find myself thinking what friends have told me about the 2nd (or 3rd, 4th etc.) child: there's not that same rush for them to grow.  With Jude I was always full of anticipation for next phase, but Graham can just take his sweet time.  

I feel like Graham has been for me.  Like Heavenly Father crafted this little bundle of exactly what I need in my life right now.  I keep telling Jeff I've never been so happy. Sometimes when I say this to him I know he's thinking, "Are you sure?  'Cause you sure seemed to be spiraling last [day of the week]..." and of course I still have bad days.  But, I don't really know how else to describe it other than to say that I feel more fulfilled than ever, that since Graham's arrival so much has fallen into a wonderful place.  I am thinking it must just be spouting from the simple fact that it is a knotch deeper into Motherhood.  And Motherhood is a place I wanted to be my whole life.  So with all the things that must be sacrificed or pushed to the back burner, it's ok, because I've got this family that makes me feel so good.  I am a lucky girl. 

Now Graham, a request: Please don't grow up and start dealing drugs or get involved with insider trading.  Thanks!

That One Time I Bawled in the ENT Office

I think the topic of Terrible Twos will come up fairly frequently for the next little while, because I tell you what, I am up to my eyeballs in it.  This is one tale of life with a Terrible Two (whom I love to no end).

It's the Tuesday after Jude's tubes surgery.  Over the weekend we found a little dried blood in his ear, and when we called our ENT he told us we MUST come in on Monday or Tuesday.  We were able to get an appointment for Tuesday.

Tuesday morning I meet my friend Brittany and her 3 kids at the park.  Brittany was going to have a babysitter meet her at the park, and then leave from there to go do hair and make up for a Nikki Minaj music video in LA.  The only problem was there was going to be a 20 minute gap where she needed to be on the road, and the babysitter would just be leaving high school.  This was close to when I needed to leave for the doctor's office, but Britt was in a bind so I offered to watch her kids until the babysitter came.  I should mention there had been an attempted kidnapping at this park 2 days prior, and people were still a little on edge being there, myself included.  So then I had a 5 year old, two 2 year olds, and 2 infants (including my kids).  The toddlers kept trying to escape in 2 directions, the babies were crying, and the babysitter was late. And this meant I was also late in leaving for the doc that I did not want to reschedule because I was really worried about Jude's ear.  So my little pulse was going wild.

Finally the babysitter comes, and I load the babies up and jet.  We're late to the doctor, but they haven't bumped us, and we take a seat with Graham in the Bjorn and Jude with some books next to me.  But Jude has been over the waiting room experience for a while, and understandably so.  In one month we had been in 8 waiting rooms, whether it was for me, Graham, or Jude (mostly for Jude, though).  This is the child who doesn't like to wait or be quiet or restrained for any reason for any amount of time.  He's getting antsier and louder by the minute.  I realize I haven't had a chance to eat since breakfast, and am really wishing I'd thrown a granola bar into my purse.  We hang out in the waiting room for AN HOUR AND FIFTEEN MINUTES.  I am about to start standing on my head to keep him quiet and entertained.  I even go up to the front desk with Graham in front and Jude on my hip and say, "I'm sorry, I know everyone here is waiting too, but do you know about how much longer it's going to be?"

Finally they take us back, but now we're just waiting in a smaller room with cabinets and drawers filled with swabs, little instrument attachments, cleaning products, and there's a very special and expensive looking chair with a computer attached and little buttons to move it all around.  So now Jude has vehicles to increase his madness and naughtiness.  He gives me the ALL BETS ARE OFF, MOM! look.  I redirect, put him in Time Out in the corner, redirect some more, try and get him to marvel at Graham, sing songs, recite books I have memorized, etc. etc. etc. to no avail so finally,

I sit down on the stool and start crying.  Like really crying.

And actually, this startles Jude and his face goes from "I'm going to be naughty because I CAN!" to "Oh shoot, what have I done??"

And then a minute later, the ENT finally comes in.  The tubes look fantastic, just a small amount of flukey blood, and he says that since we came in today and everything looks wonderful, we don't have to come in again in 2 weeks as he'd told us the day of the surgery.

Phew.

And we beeline outta there, Jude goes down for a nap, and I snuggle with Graham while stuffing my face with many, many bomb chocolate chip cookies.

The End.

Lately

- We still haven't quite adjusted to the time change.  And that's probably because I'm trying hard to NOT adjust.  We put Jude to bed 30 minutes later than normal (so at 7:30), and he wakes up at 8ish.  Before Spring Forward he would wake up about 6:30 or 7.  It doesn't quite make sense, but I obviously enjoy the extra snooze time.  For the past few weeks I've been bringing Graham back into bed with us after his last night feeding.  This morning I woke up to Jude calling to me from his crib, Graham snuggled next to me, at 9:00.  Jeff, not wanting to wake us, had slipped out like a handsome attorney thief in the night.  This is not the first time this exact scenario has come to pass.  I don't know how long this will last, but I am loving it.

- I've started running again, this time pushing 90 lbs. of stroller, toddler, car seat, car seat adaptor, and infant.  It is brutal but I can't stop.  By the time breakfast is over, I've nursed Graham, changed diapers, dressed the babies, and we've read a few books, it always ends up sounding like the perfect thing to do.   As long as Jude has snacks, a couple of toy cars, and at some point my phone to play with, he does pretty well.  I'm feeling very lucky to have a great double jogging stroller.  I don't know what I'd do without it.  This is one of those times when a THING is making my life so much easier, whether we're jogging or running an errand and I need Jude to be buckled in.

- Diapers, diapers, everywhere.  EVERYWHERE.  A friend told me shortly before G came that when she had her second she just learned to let some things go.  One of them was not stressing if the neighbors stopped by and there were diapers all over the floor.  Now I know how that just happens.  2 kids in diapers, you change them on the floor or in their bedrooms or wherever, and you get sidetracked or don't get up from your spot until 15 minutes later when you have forgotten that there was a diaper there blending in, and then an hour later you spot 3 diapers in random places that all would really probably like to be in the garbage can outside the back door.  I am not excited about potty training Jude, but at least I can assume that when this happens, this problem will diminish.

- Jude officially LOVES Graham.  He will be in the middle of crying because of some very devastating 2 year old tragedy, look over at Graham, and in a split second, snap out of the woe fest, and say, "BABY!" and with a big, gushy smile on his face, lean over him and coo, "Babybabybabybaby" and give him a kiss or two.  All my worry that Jude would hate being a brother was for nothing.  But Graham isn't old enough to steal toys yet, so we'll put a small pin in that.

- Before Jude's nap, ideally I would like to go running, shower, errands, and then meet friends for the park or whatever.  So far I haven't had that work out; one of those things always gets pushed out till after or during Jude's nap.  One day.

- We are not eating treats except for Sundays, birthdays, and holidays.  I want a piece of chocolate right now so bad I could cry.

Other than that we are just partying on.  Things are really, really good.

A Collection of Stories and Facts

- The day before G was born, I was picking up some last minute things at Target.  Jude was doing a pretty good job of staying in the cart, which is like, the worst thing ever to him and his excited personality.  But as we passed an aisle of books, all of a sudden I hear him yell, "TRUCK!" and it was all I could do to barely catch him as he lunged out of the cart at supersonic speed.  He squirmed to the ground and 2 seconds later was sitting on the floor reading a board book about (you guessed it) TRUCKS.  Yes, I bought it.  And he happily looked at it the whole way home andwe read it daily.  It has taken my truck education to a different level; I can now identify a Backhoe Loader like it's nobody's biz.

- Jude picked out his latest pair of shoes and proudly shows them to anyone he passes.  He knows his own mind on matters of footwear.

- Graham is a continual pooper.  Jude was very kind to me and would wait to attend to those matters until he was nursing.  Graham just works on his diaper at all times.  Also Jude goes through a pair of pants and about 2 or 3 shirts a day.  And thus the laundry has exponentially increased in our corner of the world.  It's ok; I don't really hate doing laundry.  Making salads and ironing, those are two domestic things that I hate doing.

- I really relate to this little number right here:

I feel like this is the best of times and the worst of times for Jude.  And for me.  He's like my best buddy and we laugh a lot together, I cover him in kisses, praise his good behavior, and tell him I love him all day.  I know he loves me, but he will be about to do something against "the rules" and I say, "No no, don't do that," and he looks at me with this expression of, "What?  You didn't want me to do....THIS?!" And boom.  Time Out.  Sometimes he then turns his back toward me or covers his eyes like if he can't see me, I can't see him, and can't put him in TO.  I'll just wander the house searching for him and then in the meantime forget he was ever naughty.  :)  Life is never boring with Jude as my daily companion.

- When Jude was a newborn, I watched Friday Night Lights.  This time, after I finished Downton Abbey Season 3 and dug myself out of the subsequent depression, a friend suggested I start watching The Mindy Project.  I didn't think I'd like it AT ALL, but it is just dumb and lighthearted and funny enough that I am HOOKED.  Perfect for this time of life where I'm exhausted and a little sensitive (although not nearly as sensitive as I am while pregnant).  

- Last night I got to see my BFFs from college, Annie and Aly, and Aly's parents in San Clemente.  I loved it because Aly's son Maddox is EXACTLY like Jude.  I didn't have to feel mortified when Jude was screaming at the tip tip tip top of his lungs out of sheer joy, because Maddox does the same thing.  In fact a couple of times Jeff or I would say, "Jude, too loud!" and then realize it was not our toddler who'd just demonstrated his premium vocal capacities.  And of course I loved it even more seeing people I love who don't live close enough.  We all have husbands and sons now -- crazy.

- I feel like a lot of time is spent keeping Graham protected from his affectionate brother.  Countless times a day I say, "Don't touch his eyes!"  The only thing that makes me excited about G getting bigger is the sturdiness that comes with it.  

- And a few pictures of my favorite Graham from weeks past.  Sigh. 

4 weeks

2 days

Graham: 1 Month

You know, I'm not that surprised anymore that Graham is a month old.  It's been so busy, I should only have expected that time would sprint by.

All things considered, I LOVE having 2!  I love having a baby in the house.  I love saying "the kids" or "the boys."  I love watching Graham morph before my very eyes, even though any sign that he'd ever stop being a newborn is a little sad too.  I love it now that Jude has stopped acting like an insecure boyfriend (think Dean on Gilmore Girls Season 2.  "Where are you going??  To the bathroom?  Can I come?  What are you looking at??  Why aren't you looking at me?  Why are you walking over to the stove??  Can I come??  Why is Mimi/Dad taking me to the park?  Can't you have someone else nurse the baby and take me instead??  WHY ARE YOU SAYING NO TO ME?!").  I didn't realize until after Jude's colic went away just how much of an anxious mess it had made me.  And that cluelessness seemed to come again during Jude's transition period.  There were a few times when I thought, "Man, I love you more than life itself, but I don't like you very much right now."  Most of the time I thought he was doing pretty well.  There was an afternoon when my mom was helping me and Jude was upstairs in his crib shirking his nap and wailing when I put my head in my hands and said, "I don't think I can do this?!"  I really do rely on his naps.  Anyway I'm positive I'll have days like that again but so far things have been fine.  I am out and about because I have to be.  Jude doesn't handle cabin fever well at all.  I have figured out my MO for the grocery store, loading the kids, the park, chasing the garbage man every Friday, etc.  I haven't tried Costco yet with both kids, and think it'll be months before I try a restaurant with them in tow (unless Jeff is there), but everything else has been fine.  

Mostly this is all possible because Graham has been such a sweetheart.  He's got me wrapped around his tiny mitten-ed fingers with his whole way of not ever really crying.  

This is also possible because once Jude is napping and down for the night, I do basically nothing.  We have had a looong stream of meals brought in for the entire month of February.  Accepting them was starting to feel inappropriate.  But I haven't had to cook much except for breakfast and arranging Jude's lunch.  Except for some cleaning, when Jude is out, I am lying down recouping my energy and having Graham time.  I protect my Graham/Rest time with the gusto of a thousand suns.  We went out with some friends to dinner ONCE and the next day I was hurting pretty bad.  So until Graham is sleeping through the night (and I won't sleep train till the 3 month mark) I will be ignoring hobbies, plans to redo the kids' bathroom, and no Nights Out with girlfriends or my lover.  2 more months. 

Now that Jude is largely back to his old self, I am enjoying some of the positives that come with being the mother of a 2 year old.  He's pushing my buttons LIKE CRAZY (and gets a few Time Outs almost daily), but this age does not get its due credit for procuring some of the cutest little habits and mannerisms.  He gets very concerned about Graham if he cries, when Graham is sitting in the swing Jude will pile blankets and burp cloths on him, if I'm nursing without the Boppy he'll bring it to me without being asked, and he gives Graham waaaay more kisses than he gives me.  Jude is still uncommonly obsessed with anything with an engine and wheels.  He wants to know the name of EVERYTHING, and points to anything and asks, "This??" alllllllllll the live-long day.  He's not as excited about saying the words, though, so we had a Speech Therapy evaluation today.  In a few weeks we'll know if he qualifies for the program.  He's also getting tubes in his ears a week from tomorrow, which will put an end to his 2 month ear ache.  Besides riding around on his push cars, driving the toy trains around their tracks, playing with friends at the park, yelling, "CRUCK!! (Truck)" 50,000 times, throwing a few tantrums, going for walks, and running errands, his favorite thing to do is get chased around the house (tickled upon capture), or "flying" around while piggy back on moi.  He is such a buddy with a zest for life that is endlessly endearing.  He may give Graham a swat just to get a rise out of me, or if I'm about to take an illegal object from him he may chuck it across the room as a power play, and he may scream like a banshee the entire time the Home Teachers are here, but he's still pretty cool.

And as for my Zen baby, Graham is more alert every day, he found his voice, he is close to smiling, squeaks while he nurses, sleeps on his side, and for the most part is text book about nights.  I am reeeeaaally enjoying him.  

TTFN; it's Graham Time.

Blurb

Here's a blurb of info while I have 2 sleeping babies, logged an awesome nap this morning, and Jeff is in the kitchen whipping up some freezer meals (I know, so sweet).

My Graham is a week old today.  It seems like it should be shorter or longer than that depending on the minute of the day.  We are doing great, but I haven't been on my own yet, so check back with me in about 10 days when my help is all gone :).  There have been moments of crazy, but not like the chandelier is shaking and everyone is screaming and there's shattered glass on the floor, more like Jude wants something he can't have and is simultaneously trying to give the baby zerberts (which just results in G getting a nice saliva spray), and I want to sleep and/or stare at my baby in a little postpartum cocoon but I know that's not going to happen until 7pm.  At which point I'll be so wiped out the cocoon won't be as easy to enjoy.

But I can tell you, Jude is handling it better than I expected, and Graham has been 100% heaven.  There is little to no anxiety regarding him, unlike last time, and I'm soaking in his smallness and the newborn squeaks.  We snuggle him and feel unbelievably lucky to get this experience -- again!

More to come, but here are a few visuals:

People are saying he looks more like me, and I do see some Eaton in that face, but I have seen Jude's newborn face flash across his about 4 million times.  I'm going to do a newborn shoot on Saturday or Sunday and hopefully I can catch some of that.

We didn't pick his name for about 8 hours, so the nurses just wrote "Hayes" on his bassinet card. 

Mimi and Grandpa came to visit, and were the only ones (besides clergy) that would have been allowed into the recovery wing because of how awful flu season has been this year.  So Jude didn't get to come, Aunt Sarah didn't get to come, and it was kind of a bummer.  But so nice that both of my boys met their Eaton grandparents at least on the day they were born.

I am so proud of all 3 of my boys!  Looking at this picture makes me feel like the luckiest girl.

New family of 4.

Intros

Graham Cameron Hayes

January 31, 2013

7 pounds 14 ounces 19.5 inches

Sweeter than you can imagine.

Everyone is home, healthy, and happy.

So, tomorrow, huh?

I'm being induced tomorrow.  I've been having somewhat painful contractions today, so maybe Pitocin won't be my lot by tomorrow morning, but I have an appointment to have a baby at 7am.  So modern.  January 31 sounds like a good day to be born!

As I polish off this pregnancy, a few fun facts:

• No swollen feet, fingers, or stretch marks (that I can see).  Wahoo to that!  (Although after Jude was born and they pumped me full of fluid, my face and feet quadrupled in size.  And I could feel it happening.  I had packed flats to wear home and I could barely squeeze my puffy dogs into them.  I'll bring flip flops this time in case it's a duplicate experience.
• The heartburn is RAGING.  It's like my body does not want me to forget that it can still do this to me for another 12 hours.  I think I have enough Tums to see me through to tomorrow, but no more.  
• The sleeping is pretty much crap now.  I have my moments of frustration since I've been trying to fill my sleep cantine, as it were, but whatever, exhaustion is inevitable.  
• We have a short list of names, but a few weeks ago we gave up on narrowing it any more than that.  I am crossing my fingers one of them clicks when we cast eyes upon his pink little face.

Today has been water works.  I did not see this coming a month ago.  My heart has been aching for Jude and the end of this era in a big, bad way.  All this week at bedtime, while rocking him and singing Primary songs, I end up sniffling through.  Today, and this was probably made worse by his insistence on laying on the cute behavior eeeextra thick, just looking at him made my eyes well up with tears.  I felt guilty, nostalgic, but also grateful.  Then my mom called and set things right by reminding me that life is not going to change that much for him -- it's Jude!  He'll make SURE life is still full of all the good things even if there's a baby living in the house that I must also give attention to. :)  True.  But it will never be the same again.  I feel like my love for him is growing so fast and so much these last days it just hurts.  Hormones might have a snitch to do with it.  What?

My mom and Sarah will be here with him tomorrow.  Mimi is bringing him trains.  I'm not worried about him having a delicious Thursday.

And as for me, I'm really looking forward to the birth.  I have such epic and cherished memories of Jude's, and hopefully this time I won't have to wait until I'm 70% of the way through labor before I get my precious epidural (being scheduled and all it sounds more easy to secure, right?).  Knowing more of what to expect and how much wonderful there is packed into those moments, I have been excited for another birth experience since 1 week after Jude became a world citizen.  Jeff keeps saying he's excited, and of course I believe it. 

Let's just see if I can sleep tonight.  

Stay tuned.....

Izze drink, sick us, and routines

So once Jude got his tummy coated in antibiotics he was back to his old tricks.  He has been such a love bug this week.  Please enjoy photos taken of him experiencing his first Izze drink tonight.

Back to the health issue: the only thing is, Jeff and I have been sick as dogs since last weekend.  I have a doctor's appointment for this week, and I thought what I have is probably viral anyway, but since the gunk in my chest is actually making it hard to breathe and Jeff came home from the doc's today with antibiotics, I have resigned myself to seeing a professional tomorrow.  I have been reading up on antibiotics during pregnancy and apparently I will most likely have some options.

However, it is because of this illness that I can't sleep, and am here blogging away at 2:51 in the morning.  

Christmas is over, and the only thing that has gotten me through that fact is nesting for this baby boy.  I am so excited to get him here safe and sound, see his little face, pick a name, etc.  I can't remember what life was like before pregnancy.  I regret taking for granted every time I lifted Jude before I had a bulge in my mid-section.  Last time, 2 months after Jude was born I couldn't remember what it was like to be pregnant.  I told my friend and her mother-in-law this one Sabbath while we waited for Sunday School to start, and mother-in-law said, "That's how Heavenly Father gets us to have more babies."  It's got to be true!  

However, I would just like to say that an extraordinary thing has happened.  I'm not wishing away these last 4 weeks of pregnancy.  YES EVEN!  I am looking at my To-Do list, and I need these remaining weeks.  During our Christmas holiday I went to Kneaders/Heaven with some cousins one night, and Kate asked me, "Isn't your heart just breaking for Jude?  Your one on one is coming to an end!"  I instantly said, "No!  I'm giving him a buddy -- that's like the best gift I could give him!"  It's true, and it feels like time to have our family expand.  I don't know how else to say it.  

But then, a few days ago I looked at Jude as we were bopping around and I realized this has been all he's known of life, and this has been such a great ride and bond we've had, just we two.  Bringing home a brother for him will change that forever.  I don't know how much and how hard it'll be on him, but it won't be the same, and it'll take strategizing and extra effort to make one-on-one happen.  So I don't know if my heart is quite breaking for the end of this era, but I want to make sure I soaked up each moment I could while it was there.

Also, our routine is about to be flipped upside down a little bit.  For a long time it's been:

Jude wakes up around 7.  One of us gets him and usually brings him back into bed with us for anywhere from 4 seconds to 2 minutes.  He's usually very anxious to get breakfast going.  I take him downstairs while Jeff starts getting ready for work.  Jude eats, and then shares some of Jeff's smoothie with him (no matter what Jude's breakfast has been) before family prayer and waving goodbye to Dad from the doorway as he leaves for the office.

Jude and I go to the gym, which is perfect for both of us.  He runs around getting out some of his limitless wiggles, plays with other kids, and toys that I didn't have to buy for about 50 minutes.  I get to watch the news or Kelly and Michael (or whatever Regis' replacement is named) and exercise.  Since we haven't had cable in a couple of years, TV watching at the gym has revealed something to me: a huge chunk of the ads shown during the 9-10:00 morning hour are targeting seniors.  Mesothelioma law suit commercials, retirement commercials, investing in gold or silver late in the game commercials, etc.  

After the gym we go home and get ready, and while I shower Jude takes it upon himself to terrorize our  poor bedroom and bathroom.  He pulls a lot of shoes out, and brings them to me to put on.  He turns on and off the bath water.  He tries to break into the baby proofed cupboards and drawers.  He tries to reach for the toothpaste on the counter and sometimes gets it, which means I have to make a wet, premature exit and get it back from him before he squirts a glob into his mouth or onto his hands.  This whole thing drives me crazy.  I don't know what else to do with him though; we don't have a TV in our bedroom to distract, and that distraction wouldn't last at this age anyway. I don't want to put him in his crib because that would be added motivation for him to learn to climb out, and/or I don't want his crib to feel like a punishment.  One thing that's really sweet, when I'm all done showering he brings me towel after towel off the hooks with this proud look on his face.  Anyway, an alternative showering MO is something I'm trying to find.

Then the rest of the morning and early afternoon are filled with errands, parks (often more than one a day), books, a play date a few times a week, lunch, and then it's nap time.

Nap time is almost always 90 minutes on the button.  As tired as I've been, I almost never nap because I need Merzy Time.

The afternoon is the witching hour and he's usually cranky.  Why?  I don't know.  It seems to be a common issue -- I just can't believe no one ever told me about it before I had Jude.  It's a bust, but we try to cure the funk with more park time and/or a show, and somewhere in there I try to make dinner. Very little of this happens before he's on my hip or crying and feeling hurt when I put him down because I must have both hands for whatever step of cooking I'm taking.  He loves to watch me cook and be involved in any way he can, which can be the cutest thing on earth or dangerous.

If Jeff makes it home before 7, they rough house and play, and then it's bedtime.  He's very big on this part being fulfilled in its entirety.  We brush teeth (the only part he's not always in love with), read The Going to Bed Book, some of The Book of Mormon (kids' version), family prayer, and then he gets some lullabyes all snuggled up. He must be clutching me (or Jeff) and his monkey, covered in a blanket. When I come to the last lines of a song he'll tighten his grip on me as if to say, "I'm not done here, so let's get another melody going fast."  Then we trade kisses and I put him in his crib.

I crash on the couch.  Jeff will bring up no fewer than 5 times how great Jude is.  

And that is the 2012-early 2013 Mom & Jude Routine.  

Who knows what it'll be in 5 weeks ;).

20 Weeks

Half-way there!  That's alright with me.  HERE I am at 22 weeks with Jude; I have decided I carry so weird.  I had the same low, tent-like peak to my stomach last time.  Where's that cute, high, basketball that other ladies have (Annie Reynolds, I'm talking to you!)??

Disappointment in prego bump styles aside, things are good.  We had a healthy outcome from our ultrasound yesterday.  Jude decided that since Jeff was there, he could act twice as crazy.  My last OB's waiting room was more of a pausing room.  This new OB I sit there for 30 to 60 minutes wrangling Jude.  I think I'll go for afternoon appointments from now on and get a babysitter.

Also get this.  This will blow your mind.  Yesterday I was 20 weeks and 0 days but the baby was measuring 20 weeks and 3 days!  So maybe I only have 19 weeks left??

Craving french bread with cream cheese and fig jam.  Want to sit but can't.  Sleeping on one side.  Forgetful.  Cleaning like every wipe and scrub is a winning lottery ticket.  Always hot (although it's cooling off a bit outside!!!).  Haven't done anything with the nursery.  Can't wait to meet my baby and be a family of 4.  Until then, soaking it up with my one wild man Jude.

Good times are here again

It took from Saturday to Friday morning for my Jude to return from the fiery pits of Mordor (Binky Detox).

I just started writing more about that, but I'm not sure how far I want to dive back into this subject because, you know, it was a really dark week.  I wondered if my happy baby had possibly forgotten that he wanted the binky and only remembered that, in his mind, a terrible injustice had occurred, might never forget it, and thus he had morphed into a chronically grumpy toddler.  Anyway, I'm extremely grateful to say that although getting over his binky seemed overly drawn out and overly dramatic, my baby is back and I've learned more blood-sweat-and-tears lessons about parenthood.  Today while he was giving me kisses and zerberts and giggling for no apparent reason other than he's high on life and drug free, the birds were chirping and the sun was shining and I was feeling good and more relieved than I've felt about anything in a long time.  

Trying out Acai bowls and Jude is whooping for joy (I think over Romney's awesome speech Thursday night.)

He may love to watch Tangled, but this boy is also all about throwing a ball, pushing a toy car around, and sneaking into the driver's seat of any car he can get into (this one conveniently with door open inside the mall for a Lexus promotion.  Dream big on so many levels, bud).

Because it was Saturday, it's a holiday weekend, and Jude was being a rock star, we did some really fun things like go to the Farmer's Market in Laguna, errands happened solo and altogether (going grocery shopping alone is such a thrill for me!), and then my parents came down to watch Jude, at which juncture Jeff and I excused ourselves for dinner and a movie.  High 5s all around.